Saturday, March 24, 2012

Satuday Snark: Buy Mah Book(!) and other Promotional Faux Pas...

You know you've seen it.
The overdone appeals to not let your Kindle, or Kindle fire, or Nook be lonely, or empty, or--for fuck's sake, how is an inanimate object lonely? And just who are you appealing to, oh you of the Buy-Mah-Book overshare? The folk you are tweeting to, or tagging in FaceBook, or sending a zillion emails to already know that you're an author.

They even know that your new book is available. Because you yourself told them. Repeatedly. Until they wanted to unfollow, unfriend and block your access to their emails and whatever other social media you have access to them on.

For the sake of your own dignity.
Just stop, for fuck's sake, and give me a moment of your time. Ask yourself a question, and look hard at the answer... do you really think that being the internet version of a pushy telemarketer is going to garner you more sales? IDK. I can only speak for myself, and babies, I block that crap. Oh, I may not unfriend you or whatever, but... I do start to tune you out. Which sucks. Because at some point you may have something to say that I would have wanted to hear. Taught me a lesson (a positive one), or reached out for help that I might have been best suited to give you... and I will most likely not know. Because I will have become so very inured to and by your spam-bot like Tweets and FB posts that I'll have glossed right on past your profile pic to see if anyone has anything interesting to say.

Don't get it twisted, babies.
Writing is a business.
For a lot of us (or at least some) it's our full-time job, and we need to treat it as such. We do need to advertise, and promote our product. We need to make those sales to bring home the bacon. You know, the figurative bacon that lets us buy real bacon to feed our families.

So if it's a business?
Treat it like one.
Get educated.
Learn how to market with skill.
Make it fun for your readers to learn about your newest, latest and greatest. Support your fellow authors, because they are NOT your competition.They are your brothers and sisters in arms, and we will NEVER have enough stories to fill the hungry void of the human mind. That's right, not ever.

By all means, let your readers and fellow authors know when you have a new release, or a new cover or a great day of writing... and if you say, "Buy-Mah-Book" only do so with a wink and a tip of your cyber-hat. Get a publicist. Cultivate fans who will talk you up on the social networks. Write the very best stories that you can and cheer every single time someone else's book breaks into the top ten list somewhere... because everyone loves a good sport. And I can tell you from experience, that I'm far more likely to buy the book written by the funny, good natured author who laughs at his or herself and roots for everyone to do well.

Didn't anyone tell you that ultimately the product you're selling is that funny little character you created first? You know the one. The author that is you. And if that character comes across as a pushy telemarketer type how likely are you to Buy-Their-Book?

I'm betting not very.

So, heh, try out the cheering others on. Build a network, and get your friends to read your book and ask them to talk about what they like or don't and why. Ask them to please do this a LOT. Get a publicist. It doesn't have to break the bank... you can get some very affordable and  truly useful help over at a place called Author Island (click on the name to check them out) utilize services like Manic Readers and get together a group of fellow authors to help promote each other. Trust me, it works. And it's a hell of a lot less annoying to your friends and potential fans.

Right, and oh, yeah. Buy-Mah-Book.

For More Saturday Snark, get thee to the Vicdom...get it? Vic-Dom? LOL... get it right here, babies:
With a Groan and a Moan


  1. *cheers, applauds, stands to feet*
    Another brilliant post Obi-wan (wait, would you be Obi-wan or the other dude? *shrugs* I have no idea, never seen the movies. Anyway....)

    One of the biggest setbacks with the whole repetitive tweeting/facebooking/blogging, etc. the same thing over and over and over again is the fact that the person who does it can become a joke. The one who other authors and publishers mock behind their back (not that I condone that but it's an inevitability) and then they don't get asked to do guest blogs by the people who would help to propel them into author stardom because that author or publisher or promoter doesn't want to be connected with them.

    You're right in that, in this business, the product that we're selling is ourselves. We have to be transparent, while still maintaining our mysterious anonymity (and I know that sounds like it's an oxymoron, but it can be done). We have to constantly put ourselves in the shoes of the readers that we are selling to and make sure that what we're doing wouldn't turn us off if we were in their shoes (does that make sense? Damn painkillers).

    The most important thing is that if you're constantly telling the same people to buy your book, then they stop telling others to do it. And in this business, word of mouth is both the most amazing, as well as, the most detrimental to our careers.

    *BTW, I think it bodes well for you that my confirmation word was tianis maapa-which I can only assume is Tian's Hero in Blogger Speak*

  2. I have heard a lot of authors and people say they completely ignore the tweets hawking books. Which is why I only tweet every once in a while the link to buy my book. Hmm, come to think of it, I tend to ignore those tweets too. I do RT them sometimes if I think the book is good and that others might like it. ^^ Otherwise, I use twitter to goof off w/ my buddies.

  3. Vic, Patty, thanks so much for stopping by. And DeNita (AuthorIsland) you are most welcome. You do good work.


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